Armin van Buuren’s “Alone” is blaring loudly on my eardrum. The song somehow made me realize it is actually telling the truth. It made me smile; now I have something to write about. Sipping my hot coffee while feeling the repetitive drops of rain against my roof, I reach out to my blank journal and began to write. This is one those afternoons where the most pressing thing you have to do was nothing; when an idea comes to my head, my fingers suddenly become busy.
The Armin song was ranting about being alone, telling me connectivity has lost its meaning when no one is connecting. Are we really? Are we well-connected with life? Well, let me talk about life (my favorite subject of all time). Life is often weird. In most cases, life is funny. Some people think life is always playing little tricks on them. Some thought life has been harsh and unfair. But for me --- I like it.
Since I'm a not-so-full-grown adult now, maybe I could list down some of the realizations life has been feeding me. I know some people would laugh at me now, but who cares? Each of us has its own way of dealing Life. What matters most is, were you able to deal life pretty well?
Life is simple when we were kids. Ah yes! That freedom! I can say that I had an awesome childhood. Seeing kids nowadays, I realize that my childhood was something I am thankful for. It was never boring, I was pretty active and I believe I have punched a lot of kids during my time. When you're a child, happiness means being under the sun playing with your friends or running naked under a heavy downpour. Happiness mostly comes naturally, without lifting a finger to get it. As I grow older, I learned that happiness has different definitions. Happiness usually happens after you decide on something, carefully thinking of the consequences you might be facing after. Life is pretty tricky, sometimes.
We grow in phases. I wore boy-clothes when I was young; I was crazy with anime when I was in college; I was a weekend drinker; I thought life would be good if I didn't take it seriously. We grow through these phases. Shifting usually comes at a certain point when we least expect it. Realization comes when we grow tired of the things we usually do and thought we could do much better. By a snap of a finger, you would wear skirt and high heels; you read better books; you drink adult milk or wine instead of beer; you take life seriously.
Healing can't done overnight. Time becomes your constant friend when you're hurting. People are born to get hurt, as my other blog says. As you grow older, nursing a broken heart or a broken soul is not the same as taking care of a scrapped knee. Forgiveness, acceptance, prayer and moving on are the key essentials needed to overcome whatever hurt you are dealing with. You will be surprised how you emerge stronger, wiser, fiercer and confident enough to face another one on the way.
Respect is earned, not given
(Self-explanatory)
True friends are rare. Oh I have a lot of friends. Different set of friends, different circles. But I can count those who are really true. I don't believe that your true friends are those who were with you since your kindergarten days, but rather those who are honest with you, brave enough to accept, correct your flaws but loves you at the same time. True friends push you to greater heights; those who extend an arm, expecting nothing in return. True friends never tolerate your wickedness, brings you to the light and helping you to become a better person, and oh, those who never strike behind your back.
Climb so high, fall so low. We all run in circles. We sometimes think we are above everyone at a certain point. Being on top is quite addicting. We enjoy the feeling of being blown away by fame, luck, money and being looked up to. Yet we forget the reason why we are up there -- to be a blessing to those under us; to inspire people and lift them up; to continue what was in a circle. But life is funny sometimes. We became sinusoidal. We fall, we rise. It is true that life knows how to make a good fall for us to realize where we stand.
Sometimes, what we are looking for comes, when we are not looking at all. I bet some will agree with me. When we lose hope and by the moment we let go, the ones we long for appear in front of us, unexpectedly. Yes, life teaches us to be patient. Life knows when we really need it or it was never intended for you. Don't push. Life knows when you are ready and if you deserve to have it, life will give it to you willingly. Remember, great things do come to those who patiently wait.
Being true means getting away from the crowd. When I was young, I told myself I was unique. Yet, I do what other people think is acceptable to them. I tend to compete like other people. I bought the latest gadgets to become one of the "now-ist". I put on makeup to blend with the crowd. I dress to make an impression. But now, I realized that I don't have to pretend to be adorable. Trying to outsmart the smart isn't my current scene of happiness but by respecting their beliefs, understanding their goals and being able to exchange useful ideas to improve one's self is way better. Telling people how you live a God-centered life when they see the different you, cursing and telling lies about people, oh what an unhappy life you have! I know their realization will come in due time. True people know how to spot a real one. Not being pretty gave me my life; it made me smarter, it made me funny, I enjoy intelligent conversations, I motivate. I find time to look for my red lipstick but more time leaving it behind.
Solitude matters
I love the company of friends. Most of the time, I am never alone. I was never alone. In fact, I hate doing things by myself. If I am crying, I want to do it with somebody even more when I am laughing. As I grow older, I realize that I enjoy being alone sometimes; to reassess myself, to reconnect with my inner child, to sort things out and to clear the mess my life had become. You need to be alone, trust me. It's one way of finding yourself again. As the saying goes, "Solitude matters, for some people, it's the air they breathe".
Oppss, I ran out of coffee now. I guess my other realizations shall be revealed after my second cup.
Also published on Medium.com |Nine Realizations that changed my Life|
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